Who me?

16 07 2009

I was supposed to write here? wtf? Oh, hiya all. My name is the Queen of Tarts and I’m quite Tarty in that respect. I was checkin’ out my old stuff and discovered a finely honed talent of mine that is the inability to throw away old stuff. I don’ frikkin’ wanna be like those old dodgers on Opera who’ve gotten these whole warehouses o’ stuff in them there 3 room houses. Ugh!

Anyz, here what I think I look like

I like me more tarty than that

I like me more tarty than that

Of course I’m not a redhead. I’m beach blond.

Last night, returning from a footy, there standing in front of me, in all his grimy glory was a playa from the match. The bastard had managed to catch my eye and was “mistakin y’ all for a friend o’ mine, nevermind you”. Pompous ass. It was high mighty fine time for a chunder but somehow I stopped meself and decided to give him a gobful. That turned out the right thing to do, as the playa was a mighty wuss, running away without a single word to say to me!!! LOL! Poor thing must’ve gotten all his gonads in hyperdrive on seeing a sheila, turned out all his bluster and grace was as useful as tits on a bull for all I saw, wonder what they  feed these players nowadays, musta been all them drugs.

Police refuse to take mugshots of Joe Jackson, they say their lenses crack

Police refuse to take mugshots of Joe Jackson, they say their lenses crack

Wacko Jacko splenidified all of us mere mortals in his memorial service. I know FK likes MJ so I won’t go in my Morpheous-stance on the matter. On the other hand, if I had a dad as evil looking as joe jackson, I’d probably throw an acid dish on his face as well as mine. Jacko did the latter, forgot the former. I think this is the same reason all of MJ’s siblings have their plastic surgeons on speed dial, their pops’ face. Damn if he ain’t ugly.

I know this blog is s’posed to be be all neat and clean and shit, and that I’m supposed to do some political post too, but whateva. I mean weve got a Pompous Ass as the Prime Minister whose head is inserted somewhere where the sun regularly shines, that place gets so much outing. I’ll marry the person who does something and removes the PA from where he is right now.

Formula 1 is all frickked up. Looks like them dead beats governin the sport kno they’re about to die, so they decide to mess with the FOTA’s head. I bet they’re snikkering over all this over a coldie in whatever manor they hold their orgies parties in.

Gotta stop yabberin’. don’t stop readin’ what FK writes coz of me. ignore me. I’m just an ashtrayon a motorbike! 🙂

Bye.

-The Queen ‘O’ Tarts





Michael Jackson – Too Good, Too Soon?

28 06 2009
Didn't get back up this time

...didn't manage to get back up this time around...

So, seems like MJ really is dead. Cardiac arrest, followed by an hour of resuscitation, but to no avail. Again, Muslims/Islam managed to tick some people off when a news channel censored Jermain Jackson’s press conference’s ending statements, where he said “May Allah be with you, Michael, always,”. Jermaine is an announced Muslim (taking the name Abdul Aziz) whilst rumors surfaced about MJ while he was in Bahrain.

I was really surprised about ToO’s news yesterday about Jackson being in Oman, esp on the personal invitation of The Essa Zadjali. But since I was not in Oman at that time (a university had hired me to study for them. Tried to resign tonnes of times but they wouldn’t let me. I had a negative salary of 250 RO/m), and there was no media coverage that I recall, so I was genuinely surprised. And then the cheesy shot of Essa & MJ with an Omani cap in MJ’s hand. Wonder what the motive was!!?

Surprisingly, again, there has been very little bile in the media so far. Frankly, I expected more. Most of it is subtle, tepid “such unfulfilled promise,” “remember what he was, not what he became,” “I loved him as a child star”, bot-man genius” et. al. Unfulfilled promise? Every LP was a masterpiece, (or atleast a best-seller).  Remember what he was, not what he became? He wasn’t a model, he was a singer and songwriter, and pretty good one at that: up there with Elvis & The Beatles in rankings. & then the condescending: he was so sweet! So precocious! Yeah? And “Smooth Criminal” is one of the greatest pieces of music of all time which I personally like. So is Billie Jean & Thriller is the best selling album of all time.

Celebrity statements are pouring in. There are tonnes of them here. Mostly repetitive though, but shows you the people who knew him. I expected more on Farah Fawcett!!

Funeral arrangements are next. Expectations are to get the body Tuesday & have something ready by then or Wednesday. Oooo! Like to see the media got batshit crazy over this one, just like they did for Diana & Elvis. I regularly want something like this (not someone dying, but some one/thing to waver, even if for an instant, like Anna Nicole) to see the media instantly stain their pants. I mean they instantly go all ga-ga and start dripping! Wow! Really talks volumes about their professionalism and sense of perspective.

So I end this here with a RIP for the man who really didn’t matter if he were black or white, coz he gave us a thriller of a ride as long as he lasted off the wall, with his dangerous defiance of cultural norms. He did rock my world once, then fell out of my life, but doesn’t take away from his history, which was not bad, btw; I still remember the time. After all, no one can beat it like the King of Pop did. Poor thing, managed to be gone too soon. Guess this is it then!

-FK